So, as you all know, I play Lash. I currently have the best Lash build in the world and I have multiple world DPS records on tracklock.gg. So I go into this Deadlock game because I feel like gracing the patrons with my presence, right? Everyone is cheering as I enter. They don't bother pushing lanes or buying items because they know that they're not going to need it--I, The Lash has come.
So I cast Arctic Blast on myself, because that's what Lash does. They call down SHARDS OF ICE FROM THE HEAVENS and they SURROUND THEMSELVES with DEADLY AMOUNTS OF FROST! All of my teammates are instantly frozen to death, but me? I merely bathe in the cold; it is my plaything. Even though my teammates are now frozen corpses, they continue to cheer, because they know that I can solo this. The gates open. I run in. With Grapple, my movement speed is increased by
40% PERCENT
Sapphire Flame sees me run by but they can't do anything about it because I'm Lash and I'm moving at
40 PERCENT
A Warden with Echo Shard Willpowers and flees in terror when he sees me traveling at
40 PERCENT
They can hear the crack of my whip. They are all cowering--no, literally, they type the /cower emote and just stand there--as I destroy Green Guardian I cast MAJESTIC LEAP on myself--FLYING, like Jesus, and I careen towards Mid Boss. The Sapphire Flame there see me coming and they just /afk the !@#$ out. Imbue my Flog before I start killing Mid Boss. A Haze tries to sleep me--
BAM!
The Haze is engulfed in flame as my Spirit Burn SEARS her from the inside out! Her reactive barrier EXPLODES in a rain of fire that spirals around my beautiful male form as I continue to kill Mid Boss. The fire rips through Haze's bones, but it doesn't even consider touching me--why? Because I've got
UNSTOPPABLE
An Ivy swoops in in Stone Form and tries to stun me but her Stone Form does 0 damage to me because of
UNSTOPPABLE
A Mina floats in and she Nox Nostras me but it is ineffective because of
UNSTOPPABLE
Mid Boss dies, I ride off upon my BEBOP mount-no, literally, I ride Bebop around, the robot, --and head over to Doubles, because I feel like farming.
Just then, I see something on the minimap. It's the Deadlock General Forums! --People are complaining about how overpowered I am! They're saying that Lash needs to be nerfed. I smirk.
That's when I decide to take out my GROUND SLAM.
25 DAMAGE PER METER
I slam down into the ground. Blue Lane shatters like glass--the ground falls out from under me. The fabric of SPACE itself CRUMBLES beneath my feet. I cackle as I enter the REAL REALM, becoming a TRUE ENTITY existing ON THE PLANET EARTH. I am a Lash walking around New York--the cops try to stop me, but they forget all about me when they take a gander at my
DEATH SLAM
DEATH AND SLAM COMBINED. CAN YOU TAKE IT?
But then, in the spaces between the gathering crowds, I see something. Someone. The smirk on my face deteriorates. .. it's one of the Sapphire Flame. Abrams.
I thought I had destroyed The Cursed Apple. I thought I had won the Ritual But all that time--
--But all that time--...
.. there he was. Just standing there. Regenerating 4, health,
per
second.
I glared at Abrams.
Abrams glared back at me.
Silence flooded the world.
"And there's nothing you can do about it," Abrams whispered.
So I cast Arctic Blast on myself, because that's what Lash does. They call down SHARDS OF ICE FROM THE HEAVENS and they SURROUND THEMSELVES with DEADLY AMOUNTS OF FROST! All of my teammates are instantly frozen to death, but me? I merely bathe in the cold; it is my plaything. Even though my teammates are now frozen corpses, they continue to cheer, because they know that I can solo this. The gates open. I run in. With Grapple, my movement speed is increased by
40% PERCENT
Sapphire Flame sees me run by but they can't do anything about it because I'm Lash and I'm moving at
40 PERCENT
A Warden with Echo Shard Willpowers and flees in terror when he sees me traveling at
40 PERCENT
They can hear the crack of my whip. They are all cowering--no, literally, they type the /cower emote and just stand there--as I destroy Green Guardian I cast MAJESTIC LEAP on myself--FLYING, like Jesus, and I careen towards Mid Boss. The Sapphire Flame there see me coming and they just /afk the !@#$ out. Imbue my Flog before I start killing Mid Boss. A Haze tries to sleep me--
BAM!
The Haze is engulfed in flame as my Spirit Burn SEARS her from the inside out! Her reactive barrier EXPLODES in a rain of fire that spirals around my beautiful male form as I continue to kill Mid Boss. The fire rips through Haze's bones, but it doesn't even consider touching me--why? Because I've got
UNSTOPPABLE
An Ivy swoops in in Stone Form and tries to stun me but her Stone Form does 0 damage to me because of
UNSTOPPABLE
A Mina floats in and she Nox Nostras me but it is ineffective because of
UNSTOPPABLE
Mid Boss dies, I ride off upon my BEBOP mount-no, literally, I ride Bebop around, the robot, --and head over to Doubles, because I feel like farming.
Just then, I see something on the minimap. It's the Deadlock General Forums! --People are complaining about how overpowered I am! They're saying that Lash needs to be nerfed. I smirk.
That's when I decide to take out my GROUND SLAM.
25 DAMAGE PER METER
I slam down into the ground. Blue Lane shatters like glass--the ground falls out from under me. The fabric of SPACE itself CRUMBLES beneath my feet. I cackle as I enter the REAL REALM, becoming a TRUE ENTITY existing ON THE PLANET EARTH. I am a Lash walking around New York--the cops try to stop me, but they forget all about me when they take a gander at my
DEATH SLAM
DEATH AND SLAM COMBINED. CAN YOU TAKE IT?
But then, in the spaces between the gathering crowds, I see something. Someone. The smirk on my face deteriorates. .. it's one of the Sapphire Flame. Abrams.
I thought I had destroyed The Cursed Apple. I thought I had won the Ritual But all that time--
--But all that time--...
.. there he was. Just standing there. Regenerating 4, health,
per
second.
I glared at Abrams.
Abrams glared back at me.
Silence flooded the world.
"And there's nothing you can do about it," Abrams whispered.
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