[[Hero Concept]] - Yi Jiaham (Loose Tomahawk Redesign)

Gabeyboy321

New member

Personality, Background, & Design:​

1732475827985.png(Design is heavily based off of the Stormlight Archive's Armor and magic system)

Personality:
Jiaham considers all laws and rules to be mostly unjust and unfair, and often follows his own codes of his making, believing himself and all his actions to be morally right. He swears himself to his ideals, and often thinks less of people who believe in letter-of-the-law. However, he doesn't show his distain, believing them to only think this way because of politicians. His morality could, would, and should be considered non-existent. Many would rightfully call him and his ideas insane or going too far. His unorthodox thinking is what enables him to get away with many of his crimes, though more often than not his actual crimes are jobs that were/are mercenary work.

Background:
Born in Korea from a Chinese mother and a Korean father, Jiaham was born into a household with very little, thus his parents died of starvation during his early teen years, which prompted him (without other options) to begin eating them. This started his obsession with eating human flesh (continuing till today) and instilled in him a fear of hunger. After he was found, he was taken to Japan and began to work in the military, and after serving for a small time in the Russo-Japanese War, was taken out to trial after 'collecting' his downed allies. He escaped using the help of a new supernatural ally that discovered him during the war, a Highspren, a spirit who forms his sword, which he used to escape. At some point he obtains ties to the Japanese mafia and becomes a mercenary for several gangs. Recently he was assigned to hunt down Yamato, but stopped after she showed him the ability the patrons have to grant wishes.

Weapon & Misc. Stats (+Melee Ideas)

Melee Ideas/Concepts:
Jab - Cancel a HM by LMing to jab, dealing less damage than a HM but you retain some momentum and have your stun time from parries significantly reduced.
Swirl - LM is replaced with a swirl motion. (Same damage)

Stormlight Meter: (Name is not final)
Abilities use the Stormlight Meter (Also known as heat %)
Firing your weapon uses the Stormlight Meter (5 SLP per shot)
Stormlight Points (Herby known as SLP):
100 SLP ^* 0.1
Running out of SLP causes you to be slowed and reduces your regen by 10. (This is to make it feel a little more interesting to run out of SLP. Your regen cannot be negative.)
Either have active reload built in or unpurchaseable, as it would just be too good and be in every build.

Weapon Stats:
On hit:​
  • 10 DMG ^* 1.0
  • +2% Firing speed (6 seconds)
  • +1m/s movespeed (2 seconds)
0.47 seconds between shots
2 BPS
20 DPS ^*

Misc. Stats:
Base Health - 500
Regen - 5/s
Movespeed - 6 m/s
Heavy Melee - 125
Jab - 100
Light Melee (Swirl) - 63
Stamina - 2
Spirit Resist - 20%
Bullet Resist - 15%
Sprint Speed - 3 m/s

Abilities

1 | Gravitation (Active)

1732475881857.png Increases/Decreases gravity on a target. Can be self-cast. Cannot stack. (Based on team)

10 sec duration
25 SLP (1.5 sec cooldown)
25% Gravity redirection

Allies Gravity decreased, enemies gravity increased.

Upgrades:
1 | Also decrease air friction by ~20%​
2 | -5 SLP, +5 sec duration​
3 | Enemy targets have -15% bullet resist​

2 | Division (Active)​

1732475909874.png Converts SLP into a burst of decay around you, lifestealing some damage.

50 SLP
4 Sec cooldown
90 DMG
15% Lifesteal

Upgrades:
1 | +3 meter range​
2 | 2x damage to NPCs​
3 | 1.5x DMG to players, -10 SLP​

3 | Severance Pull (Active)​

1732475943724.png Creates a 'wall' of decay that burns enemies and breaks breakables. (Functions like paradox's wall but moves like McGuinness)
25 SLP
20 sec cooldown
6 sec burn

Upgrades:
1 | Broken breakables drops are automatically collected​
2 | Enemies bleed for 8 seconds​
3 | Press 3 again to make the wall stop. -10 sec cooldown.​


4 | Stances (Passive)


1732475771347.png(A shardbearer successfully using stonestance)

3 Stances, each stance is a passive that can be switched to. You can choose the order in which they are chosen, although it defaults to Ironstance > Firestance > Stonestance. (Due to this, there is no 1 AP upgrade, it goes Unlock > 2 > 5)
Stances are cycled through similarly to mirage's beetles, where you can cycle through them, but they don't affect you until they 'lock in' and have a ~5 second cooldown.

Ironstance

+5 m/s sprint speed
+4 m/s movespeed
Firing does not stop sprinting
+50% Melee swing speed

Firestance

+20 SLP
+25% fire rate
+2 m/s movespeed
+10% spirit resist
+5% bullet resist

Stonestance

+100 max health ^* 2.0
+45% bullet dodge chance
Spirit damage is delegated over time
-2 m/s movespeed

(+ Smokestance)

This upgrade is here incase it is not possible for the character to only have 2 ability upgrades.
+2 stamina
+2 m/s sprint speed
+1 wall jump
+50% vault speed

No. I did not make the art.
 
I do think that some of torrents current main 3 abilities are better suited for game design purposes (not its 1 tho) but these are just food for thought.
 
Edit: I forgot to add SLP regen stats:
SLP regen occurs passively, at a rate of 1 SLP/s
SLP regen will go from 1/5/25 per second for each 0/30/60 seconds you are out of combat (not being attacked)
SLP regenerates completely with refresher
Echo shard refunds your last used abilities SLP (as well as cooldown reduction)
SLP regen also increases as your health decreases, from 1/5/10 per second while you are at 100/50/25 % max HP

Edit: Severance Pull's damage scales with spirit power, being ^*0.2
 
Edit:
SLP regen as health decreases is now 1/2/3/4/5 while at 100/80/60/40/20 % max HP

I accidentally said severance pull in the last comment, I meant division.

Gravitation upgrade changes:

1 | -5 SLP, +5 sec duration​
2 | Enemy targets have -10% bullet resist and -10% spirit resist​
3 | Also decrease air friction by ~20%​

Division upgrade changes

1 | Burn time scales with spirit power (^* 0.05), -10 sec cooldown​
2 | Broken breakables drops are automatically collected​
3 | Enemies bleed for 8 seconds​
 
While I appreciate wanting to add in a kind of Mana system (and especially appreciate the Stormlight reference) I feel like Deadlock is very specifically designed around *not* having expendable resources like that. The cooldowns are your "mana" and is typically enough to manage by itself. I don't see what you really gain by having the system on the character, either, since his abilities still have Cooldowns.

If you want to limit how much an ability can be used, but still feel it needs to be usable multiple times just give the Short Cooldown ability Charges.

Remember that Deadlock has items that both increase ability charges and has many ways to reduce Cooldowns, so a character who has a default low Cooldown has to benefit from things in other ways. For example, Geist has a 6 second Cooldown on her 3 by default which goes down to 3 seconds at higher rank. Since this ability doesn't benefit from bonus charges or Cooldown much, it instead has a very good debuff and Spirit scaling for an ability with such a low Cooldown.
 
While I appreciate wanting to add in a kind of Mana system (and especially appreciate the Stormlight reference) I feel like Deadlock is very specifically designed around *not* having expendable resources like that. The cooldowns are your "mana" and is typically enough to manage by itself. I don't see what you really gain by having the system on the character, either, since his abilities still have Cooldowns.

If you want to limit how much an ability can be used, but still feel it needs to be usable multiple times just give the Short Cooldown ability Charges.

Remember that Deadlock has items that both increase ability charges and has many ways to reduce Cooldowns, so a character who has a default low Cooldown has to benefit from things in other ways. For example, Geist has a 6 second Cooldown on her 3 by default which goes down to 3 seconds at higher rank. Since this ability doesn't benefit from bonus charges or Cooldown much, it instead has a very good debuff and Spirit scaling for an ability with such a low Cooldown.
Thanks for the feedback!
Although, I am going to dispute some (not all) of what you said

1. I do want to say that I tried pretty hard to take an existing deadlock character (Tomahawk) and adapt them to the new style. Tomahawk has a Heat system, which is the same as what I have here, except there is no punishment for overheating (other than reloading) and the abilities mostly refund the heat instead of use it, which I thought was a bit counterproductive. (I say this to use reference point for this character)

2. Jiaham's weapon damage and SLP directly increase with spirit power, (being 1.0 and 0.1 respectively) which means that your abilities become inherently more spammable over the game (I do think I should change this a little) and thusly Jiaham benefits more from activated items, unlike most other characters who like to have just 1 or 2 of them. (if any)

3: Changes I am making from this feedback:

Severance pull's cooldown reduced to 10 seconds
Severance pull cost reduced to 40
Division cooldown increased to 10 seconds (In my last change I accidentally said division when I meant Severance pull)
Division SLP cost reduced to 35

Gravitation now has 2 default charges, and gets +1 charge on the last upgrade
0.5 sec cooldown between charges, 8/6/3 seconds to regenerate a charge if you use 3/2/1 charges

Severance pull's 2nd upgrade (2 ability points) now also slows the target slightly while burned

Division upgrade changes:
1 | +3 meter range, -10 SLP​
2 | 2x damage to NPCs, reduces NPC bullet resist by 12%​
3 | 1.5x DMG to heroes, reduces all heroes resistances to 0% (cannot increase resistances)

Once again, thanks for the feedback!
 
In-game behavior and personality:

I'd like to think he speaks fluent Korean, English, and decent Japanese, with a little Mandarin and Chinese floating about in that brain of his.
As to interactions, he isn't directly antagonistic to anyone (except ), but would probably make comments on how people would tase good/bad after killing them.

His voice should be softer, and I imagine him having a small voice.
I'd like to think he tries to comfort everyone that he wont eat them, but they just get more unnerved.
When prompted how he never gets caught, he replies with: "I get creative."

He unnerves every human character except McGinnis and Paradox. (Includes characters that were once human)
He unnerves most nonhuman characters with the exception of Krill (not Mo), Haze, and Viscous (he's just a tad confuzzled)
He dislikes the taste of Abrams people but likes Infernus's. (Sweet vs. Spicy)
To Seven: "Eating you would be like licking a taser. But fatal."
Ivy is made of stone. He would rather starve.
He does not recognize Paradox as a human.
I'd imagine he'd ask Holiday how captain murphy tases, as a joke. (thus continuing the tradition of ingame holiday-murphy shipping.)

I'll add more later
 
Btw his wish is to end world hunger - he mistaken believes that the patron would just not make humans feel hungry - he hasn't had a lot of time to think about the wish
 

Ironstance

+5 m/s sprint speed
+4 m/s movespeed
+25% healing effectiveness ^* 0.5
+25% healing reduction (to enemies)

Firestance

+25 SLP
+35% fire rate
+3 m/s movespeed
+20% weapon damage ^* 0.5

Stonestance

+200 max health ^* 2.0
+45% bullet dodge chance
Spirit damage is delegated over time
-2 m/s movespeed

Smokestance

+20 spirit power
+2 m/s sprint speed
Reduces nearby enemies bullet and spirit resist, if there is only one hero, this effect is tripled:
-10% spirit and Bullet resist (20m range)
 
I think severance pull could be reworked to be more like bebop's hook or Yamato's flying strike, but I don't have any concrete ideas for that yet
 
After doing some brainstorming, I thought to change his name to Yi Chaeŭhn, an actual Korean name (with an embellishment to make his name more symmetrical), unlike the previous made-up one. The specific hanja used are 災 and 殷.

I would also note that the common term for gravitation is lashing. I did not mention this above for, obvious reasons.
 
I thought, Hey! Maybe I can write up some more dialogue for Chaeuhn!
It took awhile.

Kill Seven: You aren't four.
Kill Dynamo: I have met woman of stars. Why do you seek to emulate her?
Kill Vindicta: May you rest, kwisin.
Kill Abrams: I fear I may have earned bad luck.

Man, that is harder than it looks. You have no idea how much Korean folklore I had to look through only for it to not work out
 
Hey I love your idea but the only problem i have is the character's design, i feel like it would be weird in Deadlock to see a full on medieval knight in this noir-new york-occult aesthetic. I know his lore has Yamato in it but even then Yamato's redesign is gonna have yokai/yakuza look to it, i feel like he can have an aesthetic that looks closer to something like the Korean grim reaper "Jeosung Saja" since it fits the occult-aesthetic better, idk.
But i really respect your effort and knowledge of all the stats and lore.
 
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